As My Tears Fall…

One of the things that draws me to some of the blogs that I read is the honesty I see from other mommy bloggers like me. There are thousands upon thousands of mommy blogs out there, and many of them you never get to see or read about their real mommy moments… and shouldn’t that be what we write about the most? I’m going to try and be honest today, as honest as I can be… I NEED to let it out and I NEED prayers, but this isn’t just about bad mommy moments.

Our family is struggling, J is never home, not because he doesn’t want to be but because of the job he took in July. He accepted this position to be closer to our new home, but it turns out that this job, while physically closer, is actually keeping him away more than any of us desire. He is drowning in a place where he isn’t allowed to fully do his job and is reprimanded for TRYING to do his job. Now, before I get comments stating that I should be thankful he’s not in a job where he’s taken away for weeks or months at a time, or thankful that he HAS a job… I GET IT. I AM thankful, but that doesn’t mean that on long days, like the one we are going to be experiencing today, that I’m not missing him and wishing he were here to spend time with me and our children. Tonight will be yet another night when I feed our children, give them their baths, read them books, tuck them in… and my daughter will ask me, “Mommy, where’s Daddy? Daddy is supposed to kiss me goodnight too, I want him to tuck me in…” And I will struggle not to break down into tears while I explain to her that Daddy has to work late again.

A month ago I worried that I might be suffering from prenatal depression, but the fact of the matter is… thankfully, I’m not. I am however, completely devastated that this is what our life is right now. My tears come more often because in this moment of our lives, we are not where we want to be, we are not happy with how things are going… I miss my husband, I miss my children squealing with delight because their Daddy just pulled into the driveway, I miss those few precious hours after the kids are tucked in when I have my husband all to myself. My children are suffering, because not only do they miss their Daddy, but they don’t understand why mommy cries when Daddy leaves for work. My patience is wearing thin, I am home alone with these two precious babies of mine 90% of the week… without a vehicle to get us out of the house, without a way to go outside without getting entirely eat up by mosquitoes (they are REALLY bad at our house)… so because of all that, I am NOT the mother I want to be to my children.

I spend hours upon hours on the computer hunting for job openings, updating and sending off J’s resume and cover letter, praying and BEGGING God to pull us out of this rut. My greatest fear in this moment, is that nothing will change in the coming months, that something will come up at his job and he won’t be able to get home when it’s time for Baby Bird to be born… that I will be alone. That he will miss the last birth we might ever experience, that he won’t get to fill that joy of being present for her arrival.

I’m tired of the tears flooding down my cheeks, I’m tired of the endless days of not knowing whether or not my husband will be home in time to kiss my babies good night. I’m tired of his staff not showing up, I’m tired of the management team undermining his authority and demeaning him as a person… I want my life back. I want OUR life back. I want and I need some normalcy in my life again, I want to enjoy these last few months of this pregnancy… I want us all to fill joy again. I’m trying really hard not to complain all the time, and I’m praying and hoping that God will bring us through this mess very very soon. Until then, will you lift our family up in prayer?

Soap Nuts Liquid Laundry Detergent Review

Never heard of soap nuts? These are pretty incredible if you ask me. If you’re trying to live as green as possible and use products that are organic and completely natural… soap nuts are definitely for you! Soap nuts are the ONLY type of detergent that actually grows on TREES! And Green Virgin Products purchases the highest quality of soap nuts (USDA Certified Organic) available.

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You can use soap nuts in their natural form (in a small wash bag of course) or you can purchase a liquid detergent made from these soap nuts. I have used soap nuts in their natural form, and we loved them! We used them on our cloth diapers for a while before moving into our new house… that has SUPER hard water. They didn’t work well on our diapers with the hard water, but they did still work great on our clothing and linens.

I was excited to the have the opportunity to review a liquid form of soap nuts, we’ve been having a hard time with our towels coming out feeling a little crunchy and not so clean. I know it’s from our hard water, but it seemed that whether we used organic detergents made for our cloth diapers or regular old detergent, our hard water was just making it difficult to get the soft fluffy towels we love so much.  I think this liquid soap nut detergent was our solution!

It’s recommended to use 2 pumps of the liquid detergent in a front load HE washer or 3 pumps in an average load in your top load washer. I actually used 4 in my top load HE washer with a full load of towels. I also added a capful of Calgon to help soften the water.

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My towels came out soft, fluffy and they smelled great! I haven’t yet tried this particular soap nut form on our clothing, but I hope to do that soon. You can find this particular detergent, or the nut form at Green Virgin Products website. They even have some bar soaps if you’re interested in trying those! Once you go to the website, you can enter your email and get 10% off your ENTIRE order! So hurry over and try some soap nuts!

I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.

We Downsized… AGAIN.

You may remember a previous post about how I went on a rampage through my children’s rooms and got rid of a TON of stuff. Well, that went really well actually. At the time Boogie and Bubby had separate rooms and they each had a few things each to play with. Well… J and I made the decision to put them in the same room (the bigger of the two) and create a nursery for Baby Bird in the smaller room. That got the changing table and her drawers and such out of our room, and then just the co-sleeper will be in our room until she’s old enough to sleep in the crib.

(My apologies for the grainy pictures ahead… I had my phone on hand and just used that!)

The problem was… combining all of their toys was becoming an issue. So, I didn’t throw out stuff, instead, this time we are rotating. Boogie has an Ikea kitchen with assorted foods and such, a dollhouse, a dress-up bin, and her babies. She will be rotating the kitchen, dollhouse and dress-up bin every Saturday night.

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As for Bubby, we decided to put away his train table, tracks, and small trains for the time being. Boogie was the main one to play with those, so we left out the few small trains he enjoys and his larger, chunkier trains. When he is older, and the girls start sharing a room and he gets a room to himself we’ll bring those things back out. He also has his balls, hats, stacking train and rings, and a big fire truck and plane.

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In the living room we were going to bring down the two shelves of books (one has board books, the other has regular books), instead we are going to keep a basket of board books, a basket of regular books, and a basket of their little books out and rotate those with the ones upstairs every Saturday night. We also have three different kinds of blocks: wooden blocks, mega blocks and bristle blocks. So we will rotate those every week as well.

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So far… today things are going slightly better, now if we could just get Bubby to understand that hitting, biting and smacking are NOT OK!

It’s Been A While!

It’s been a while since I posted an update on Boogie and Bubby, so I figured now that we have moved our “office” into our room downstairs… I might actually get around to doing so this evening! I know… I know… you’re INCREDIBLY excited! 😉

Since my last picture post of the kids (Mother’s Day), Bubby has gotten a haircut (his first!), he is EVEN MORE verbal (if that’s even possible), and he’s ornery as ever. Seriously… this kid is giving me a run for my money. He is the most exhausting and most ADORABLE little boy… I tell J often that God made him cute for a reason, ha ha!

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The kids and I took a trip up north with my mom (Mamaw) to visit some of our relatives on her side of the family in May. My two cousins have 3 children between them, so my two had a blast getting to know them. We went to the zoo (Bubby slept through the entire trip), spent time exploring, thrift store shopping (mom can’t go anywhere without thrifting), and had an overall great time! The kids did great on the long drive (ended up being 8-9 hours both ways).

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Boogie is growing like a weed, I know I’ve said this over and over again on my blog but she just continually amazes me with how bright and vivacious she is. There is never a dull moment when she is near, and her love of learning is breathtaking. Tot school has been a bit sporadic for us lately with us not being able to utilize our tot school center upstairs just yet. We did a full week of B is for Butterflies two weeks ago and she thoroughly enjoyed that, but it’s so much easier to get my supplies together and organized when we can use them upstairs. Hopefully within the next 2 weeks we can accomplish that.

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A few more changes have occurred in our house today, the house we bought is a 3 bedroom (no bedrooms upstairs, the upstairs is a big open space that we are utilizing for storage, music, and school), so we decided that like we did with Boogie and Bubby we wanted to create a nursery for Baby Bean. No, Baby Bean will not be using that room until he/she is probably 9-12 months old (if not later), but we like having that space for naps, the changing table and to help keep our room feeling like it’s still OURS. So we moved Bubby into the larger of the 2 small bedrooms with Boogie. They LOVE it. We actually put them together for a short period of time prior to moving here while we were packing up our house. Bubby seems to sleep better with her near, and seeing her as an example of how to put yourself to sleep seems to be a bonus as well!

We plan to keep them together until Baby Bean is about Bubby’s age or older, if Baby Bean is a girl she will be moved into the bigger room with Boogie, and with Bubby if Baby Bean is a boy. We think it will work out well. Otherwise, if Boo and Bubby are enjoying being together we may just leave them until Boogie requests a room alone or if she has a baby sister and wants to room with her later. Obviously, when they all hit teenage years we will cross that bridge…. it may even mean adding some bedrooms upstairs to give everyone privacy! Who knows!?

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Another big change in the Mustard Seed Mommy household… since we moved J has been commuting 45-60 minutes to and 45-60 minutes from his job. The gas being spent and that time away from us has put on a toll on him. Thankfully, a few weeks ago he was offered a position slightly closer in the opposite direction. He’ll be traveling approximately 30 minutes there and 30 minutes back. SO much better, and no mountain to kill the van or rob it of gas. We are so blessed and thankful for this opportunity and we’ve already found lots of things to take the kids to do in the area. I hope to post some pictures of the kids at the Splash Pad we found soon, though those will be cell pictures since there is nowhere to stand without getting wet there! Ha!

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Be on the look out for more posts, I’m so excited to have better access to my computer so that I can post more. I’ve missed my normal blogging time! God Bless!

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Tools4Wisdom 2014 Mom Planner Review

Disclosure: I got this product as part of an advertorial.

I’m a little OCD… but just a little. I like to have everything planned and written down, with colorful pens of course, and everything has to be organized, neat and concise. My house is never as neat and organized and perfect as I would like…. but my planner, and our binders (I have a blog binder, a homeschool binder, a finance binder and an Origami Owl binder) and my desk…. that I can keep neat and clean (most of the time!).

I was given the opportunity to review a mommy planner, which is available for purchase on Amazon. I was pretty excited about it, and I’m sure as my friend, Christa, reads this… she’s going “nerd alert!” Ah, well… as I was saying, I was pretty excited about it. I have a small planner that I tote around in my person or the diaper bag, I keep track of appointments, dates to remember, and my to do list in it. That’s all fine and dandy, but I wanted something bigger that I could keep track of EVERYTHING in. All the above that is kept in my small planner, as well as blog to do’s and deadlines, personal to do’s, things that need to be accomplished around the house, and tot school schedule! Yes, I have a binder for school and my blog, but it’s a pain in the rear having all of my schedules scattered every which way.

Here’s my slew of planners and accessories I use for my planners:

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The smaller planner I purchased at Target, as well as my colorful pens and my dollar bin stickers and labels (see below).

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You have to love the Target $1 Bins! As I said before, the smaller of my planners goes everywhere with me, I’m just now updating the May section, so it looks like we’re not busy next month, but we REALLY really are.

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Now on to our Tools4Wisdom Planner! My favorite thing about this mommy planner is how everything is split up on the weekly calendar pages. You have a section for mom, dad, kids, meal planning, family goals, personal goals, etc etc. It’s organized very nicely, it’s definitely going to make organizing our life into one book much easier!

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Here’s a better view directly from Tools4Wisdom, as you can see, they point out all of the different spaces on the weekly planner pages.

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Here is a close up of the bottom section where you can see I used my handy dandy Target $1 bin stickers!

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Tools4Wisdom doesn’t just offer Mommy Planners, they offer a wide arrange of different types of planners, including a Student Planner, Goal Planner and Daily Planner. Their prices are reasonable, though I would pay a bit more if they’d add some modern and contemporary color to their planners! With the black and white, it’s a little dull and just “blah”, but the structure and the organization of the planner is pristine.

About the Mommy Planners, directly from Tools4Wisdom:

Tools4Wisdom planners help Mommy’s make daily choices that are smart…
… And are filled with thought provoking sections to inspire – and follow the calling of your heart.

But don’t take our word, please try yourself and see…
… There is nothing to lose through Tool4Wisdom’s unconditional satisfaction guarantee.

Planner Features:
– Spiral-Bound Weekly Mom Planner
– 2014 Calendar
– Yearly and Monthly Goals Sections
– Mommy oriented Weekly Planning Sections
– Journal Pages
– 1-year unconditional money-back guarantee

Planning pages include:
– 12 goal setting pages
– 12-months weekly planner with 2-page/month goals pages
– 2-page/month calendars
– 2-pages/week planner
– journal pages

If you are interested in purchasing a mommy planner you can find them HERE or see a preview of the planner HERE.  I’ve posted a few other links below, thanks for stopping by – keep an eye out for a photo post and an update post later this week! God Bless!

Tools4Wisdom Products

Tools4Wisdom Website (webinars and videos)

Facebook

Twitter

Pinterest

I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free using Tomoson.com. Regardless, I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers.